Fantasy (a DesTa fanfiction)

author's note: I took the inspiration from VIXX's newest song, Fantasy. The song was so dark that I came up with this story. So, enjoy :D

FANTASY

I made a wish under the bloodshot sky…

That this would all be a dream when I open my eyes…

But it didn’t come true…

We are entities that people fear. Beasts that changes under the moonlight. People called us the werewolves. We lived and hunt in a group. We hunt other animals, and never hunt humans since we made a promise to not kill each other. It was a peaceful time for us…

Until the humans betrayed us…

They start hunting us down cause of some ridiculous rumor that drinking our blood would give eternity. Attacking our home while we’re asleep. With bullets made of silver, they shot each one of us, harvesting our blood. We were foolish to trust the humans and humans weren’t smart enough to believe in such a foolish rumor.

In the end, the slaughter left nothing than false rumour….

And me alone….

Get back up…

Off that dream…

-21th century-

As time passess, people forgot about other entity like werewolves, vampires and such things. We exist only as a fantasy, a mythical creature exist only in stories. I, as the last remnant of the werewolves once had a hard time to hide to hide but now it’s much less of a problem. I could get anything I used to need to hunt at the market now. Getting things is much easier as long as you have something that humans use to trade things with, money.

By that, I myself work at a small restaurant as a waitress to blend in with society and live in a small apartment just a few blocks away from where I work. I put on a distance with everyone else. I still can’t forgive the humans for what they did back then, but I need to blend in to survive.

“Hey, Desyyyyyy!!!”

Except for this girl which always tries to approach me.

“Hey, are you listening to me?”

“yes yes, I’m listening~”

“You’re lying….” She pouted

Her name is Okta. A few, no, much hundred years younger than me. She’s a fellow worker at my place. A bright girl which couldn’t stay still. She’s much loved by the other workers and even the customer. A nice human, unlike the others. Though, I still don’t intend to befriend a human.

“You know, you really should stop being cold” She complains

“Whatever” I ignore as I continue my work putting on some cup on the shelves.

“You wouldn’t have a friend you know if you keep on like this”

“Don’t need one. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to flip that sign to “open” and start working.” I leave her

I don’t need any human friend. How could I…when you all hunt us down back then without mercy, taking all my beloved one. I was lucky enough only because my parents protected me from the bullets and I had a chance to run away. Though…it still leaves me many regrets. Why couldn’t I save them? Why wasn’t I strong enough to protect everyone?

I hate those humans but on the other hand I envy them. Why can’t I just be human? Why can’t I live in peace with them? I’m tired of hiding. I’m tired of being different. I’m tired of being alone.

Someone help…

I know that it’s too late…

Someone help…

Even if it’s late…

My fantasy in my embrace will stop everything…

I want to live in that place…

“So by that, I think we need 2 waiter or waitress to move to the night shift.” The store manager suddenly announces it

Two of our workers had moved from this town because they had found a better workplace and the manager needs 2 people to replace them. Everyone starts to look at each other. Everyone was in doubt because it’s a little dangerous around here at night. Some of them even look at me as if they’re telling me to take that offer. Fine, not a big deal for me though. I could always scare someone who messes with me by transforming into a wolf.

“I’ll take it” I raise my hand

“Then, me too!!” suddenly okta raise her hand. I was shook

“Okay then starting tomorrow, Okta and Desy will be on the night shift. Thanks both of you.” The store manager left

Everyone then sigh in relief. Some of them fake sympathize that Okta took the night shift. Those fakers. When everyone start going back to their station, I approach Okta.

“Why’re you taking the night shift too?” I ask

“Can’t I?” she asks back

“No, it’s dangerous at night around here.”

“So you’re worried about me! Aww, I’m flattered” She says cheerfully as she hug me

“Get off” I push her away and embarrassed by her act while she smiles widely “Whatever, I don’t care anymore if you get in danger”

I left her and get back to my work. I can’t read that girl. Why is she always meddling with everything I do?! But…it’s not that bad. I don’t hate her either. I know she’s just being nice. But I’m afraid of that. I’m afraid that if I become friends with humans, I would betray my clan who died because of them.

-the next night-

“aaand we’re finished!!” Okta says as she finishes putting on the chair on the tables

“Thank you for the hard work everyone. You’re free to go home now. Oh, and don’t forgot to lock the store” the store manager said as he left. Such an irresponsible person.

“I’ll do it! Everyone else could go home first.” Okta offers herself

Everyone praises her and start to left one by one. I don’t understand her. Isn’t she being too nice? Why are you putting yourself after others?

“Aren’t you going home?” She asks me as I stand there looking at her watching others left one by one

“…..I’ll walk you home. It’s not safe for a girl to be alone at this time.”  What am I even saying. Why am I worried about her…

“Aren’t you a girl yourself?” She chuckles “Wait, I’ll take my bag first” she smiles widely as she runs to the locker room.

It’s not like I want to be friends with her or what, it’s just I feel bad if I left her alone. Especially on this time and this town. It’s not safe.

“Let’s go!” she says as she finishes taking her bag

We lock the store and then goes on our way home. The streets is so quite and dark. It feels scary if you walk here alone. I have a bad feeling about this. But I hope it’s just my feelings. We both walk in silence. I’m confuses of what to say.

“Is it okay if you walk me home like this? My house is a bit far from here you know.” Okta asks

“No problem” well, I could always turn into my wolf form to go here and there faster.

“You know, I’ve always thought you’re a nice person inside. I’m glad my thoughts was right.” She smiles brightly as she says those words. I blush a bit. I think now I know why everyone likes her. But still, she’s just too nice.

As we walk, we finally arrive at a rather large house. I’m stunned. I mean, if she lives in a large house like this, why would she still needs to work? But I can’t ask that question. Who am I to ask such a thing?

“So, thank you for walking me home.” She bows and smiles

“You’re welcome” I simply answer

“Careful on your way home”

I just nod for an answer as I turn back and start walking back home. But suddenly I hear her scream. I look back and see some bunch of man dressed in black and shades trying to abduct her. As I try to run back and save her, suddenly one of the man points a gun at me. I can finish this easily if I transform but then that means I will be revealing who I am.

As I hesitate and stand there doubting, suddenly a car came and stop near them. Those abductors enter the car along with Okta. They then start to drive away hurriedly. This is not the time to be doubting for my own safety. I must safe her. She doesn’t deserve this kind of treatment.

I transform myself into a large black wolf twice the size of a human and start chasing that car. In an instant I caught up with them. Luckily there’s no one out neighborhood so it’s only between me, her and those abductors. I jump on to the top of that car and rip the roof of the car with my claws, revealing their frightened faces. I took Okta and put her on my back. One of them tries to shot me but it has no effect as long it’s not a silver bullet. I destroy the car’s back wheel and jump off the car, leaving that car crashes into a tree and run away quickly with Okta on my back, bringing her back in front of her house again.

I put her down gently. Her face is still in shock looking at me. I hope she doesn’t know who I am in this state. As I was going to rush back to my place, she suddenly grabs one of my finger and say “Wait…” she pauses for a second, “Thank you for saving my life” she continues and smiles brightly like how she smiled to others

I nod and then run away back to my place hurriedly. How can she still smile like that to a beast like me? Did she notice it was me? No, it can’t be. I didn’t even transform in front of her. I know nothing anymore. She always confuses me. I hope it wouldn’t be awkward between us tomorrow at work. I’m sorry my ancestors….I saved a human….

Fantasy, you spill onto me…

You’re my tragedy, my remaining everything…

In my stolen heart, in my crooked fate…

Fantasy, fantasy…

-The Next Night-

I go to my workplace as usual. As I arrived there I see her there, looking all fine. She sees me arriving and greeted me as usual. Strange. The night went smoothly as usual and again, all is left is just me and her on the shop. There’s an awkward silence between us. I was thinking about going home first but I’m just afraid that this girl would get abducted again.

“Say, Desy, about yesterday…” she pauses. This is it. She must be afraid of me. Shoot, I know it. I shouldn’t have saved her! “Thanks a lot. I knew it you’re a nice person.”

Wait what? I’m dumbfounded. “Wait, wait, you know what I am, right?”

“The werewolf? Yeah, so what?”

I’m shook

“I thought they exist only in stories but here you are a real life one! Cool!” She’s excited

“But I’m….” I’m speechless

“Scary? Yeah at first. But then again, you saved my life! So what?”

This girl’s positivism is unbelievable “So you don’t hate me? Or scared?”

“Not at all.” She smiles warmly “So you don’t need to put on a distance anymore you know?”

How…did she see through my thought?

She approaches me and give me a warm hug. Somehow my heart aches, and a drop of tear runs down my cheek. “There, there. You must’ve been through a lot. From now on I’ll be your friend. You don’t need to be alone anymore.”

I’m sorry everyone…I just can’t hate this human….

Your existence is heaven and hell…

The standard to divide that line I promised to be your angel...

You need to have me…

Each day since that day, Okta has been helping me out to interact with the other workers or other humans. It was hard to open up at first, but step by step I learn to talk with someone. Thanks to her, everyone starts accepting me though they were at first shook at me wanting to interact with someone else. I need to thanks her a lot.

But there’s still something bugging me about her. Even though she’s so nice, I felt something is off. Especially after seeing her house. Though we’re close now I still can’t ask her about that. I think it’s somehow private but…I just can’t help being curious. Should I ask her later when we finish today’s work?

The clock finally strikes 9 p.m., time to close the shop. After the other workers was left and there was only both of us, I collect my courage to ask her, “Hey Okta, I’ve been wondering…”

“Yes?”

“Your house is rather large but, why are you working here?”

Her eyes widen. I shouldn’t have asked her maybe. She smiles then, a bitter smile “Tomorrow, we have a day off, right? Would you…stay at my place tonight?”

WAIT WHAT?! My heart just skipped a beat. But wait, maybe she just wants to tell me about that problem, right? It must be it. “Umm…okay.”

As we walk down the street from the shop, there’re no words between us. She who usually looks bright now has a slight frown on her face. It’s painful to watch her like this. But I really need to know about her. She knows me, means I need to know her. If not, we’re not friends.

We arrive at her house. As soon as we step in the front door, there’s a large hall with two stairs to go to the second floor. Everything inside is so shiny and…glamorous. I’m in awe. Then suddenly a maid greets both of us. With this kind of wealth, why would you work in some restaurant as a waitress?

We then go straight to her room which is on the 2^nd floor. Compared to the hallway where we entered, her room was rather….plain? empty? It’s still a glamorous room but with not much decoration. How should I say it…this room has no soul?

“Umm…Your room is…nice.” I try to start a conversation

She doesn’t reply. Her face rather become darker. What’s wrong really...

She sits on the edge of her bed and ask me to sit beside her. I sit there and suddenly she puts her head on my lap.

“With just one more person here it feels different.” She says smiling in a sad way “You know, I’m always alone here in this house. Do you know the Safira company?”

I nod

“It’s owned by my mother. My mother was the successor of the Safira family. She falls in love with my father which is isn’t from a wealthy family. My grandparents didn’t approve their relationship since the first time but my mother just won’t listen. She keeps dating him and that forbidden love has result in me. My mother asked my father for his responsibility and marry her but then, it was revealed that actually my father only used my mother for her wealth and secretly had an affair with another woman.” She stops and then stand up. She unbuttons her shirt and shows her bare back.

What I see….is horrifying. So many scars mark are engraved on her back.

“My mother hates me to the core…every time I made a mistake, she’d punish me by hitting me with dull objects or give me a whip or two. My uncle who pity me suggest to exile me somewhere far from mother. And here I am, alone in this spacious house.” She finishes as she buttons back her shirt

“And your mother now?”

“Married with another man and had another child”

“…I’m sorry for asking such a thing.” I feel bad and give her a warm hug and suddenly she burst into tears. Crying…loud….

“I just want someone to love me as I am. I’m tired of being perfect. I’m tired to smile when inside I’m lonely.”

“I know…” I caress her hair, calming her “You’ve done enough. You don’t need to put on a front anymore. I accept you as you are.”

Me and her are the same. We’re both lonely creatures who needs someone who accept us as we are. It’s lucky that we found each other. I just….want to protect her. She’s been through a lot. She’s a human, but treated unlike a human. Why would humans hurt each other… why can’t they accept each other as they are?

“Don’t worry. Anytime you feel lonely you can call me like this, I’ll be here in a flash. You know I can run fast, right?” I smile widely comforting her. She smiles in response. Don’t worry, I’ll be the one to protect you.

The addiction that fills me…

Pierces my heart…

It rides me and thickly flows…

As time passes I and Okta grew closer and I think I’m more accustomed to the society now. I feel like I’ll be fine as long as no one knows my real identity. And Okta…I guess she’s doing fine now. She’s still smiling here and there but at least in a more natural way. Every night I would walk her home to assure she’s alright and sometime she’d ask me to accompany her home. It’s fine for me though if I could make her feel less lonely.

And tonight as usual as I walk her home and arrived, she suddenly says “Say, are you free this Sunday?”

“Yeah, I am.”

“Would you like to….go with me to the amusement park?” This is unexpected “I mean, we always meet in workplace or sometimes at my place and we never hangout somewhere else. Umm…” She’s confused at what more to say and she’s blushing a bit. It’s the first time seeing her being shy like this.

I chuckled and pat her head “Fine with me.”

She looks so happy and jump in excitement “Okay! We’ll meet here at my house at 10 a.m.! Don’t be late okay!!!” she waves as she enters her house and still with her wide smile.

As I arrived home, I throw myself on my bed and think about the plan for Sunday. Only thinking about it kinds of making me blush a bit. She’s so cute when she’s confused and shy. It’ll be the first time we go somewhere else other than our workplace and her house. Is this a date? No no, it couldn’t be.

Sometimes I would think if I’m…starting to fall for Okta. I don’t know. I’m just happy if she could smile happily, if I could ease her loneliness and if I could be by her side. I don’t know if this is feeling is what you’d call love or not. But…isn’t it wrong if I fall for her? After all, we’re both…

-Sunday-

I can’t stay calm this whole week at the thoughts of her. I really need to calm my heart because it’d be awkward if I don’t. Arriving at her house, there I see her in her white short dress standing in front of her house. She wears a bit of makeup but still with a natural look. She looks different from every day when I see her. She looks so…beautiful.

“Oh, you’re here” She notices me arriving

“Umm, yeah…” I’m still a bit stunned “You look….beautiful” those words just slip through my tongue

She blushes a bit before smiling widely and say “Thanks!”

We then go to the amusement park taking a bus. It’s not too far and just about 30 minutes by bus. The amusement park is located near the sea and it has a nice view and breeze. Since it’s Sunday, there’re a lot of people coming. I never went in this kind of place so it’s kind of making me nervous.

“WOOOW!!” She shouts in amuse. Her eyes are sparkling “Look at all the rides!!! Come on Desy! Hurry up!” She grabs my hand and pull me.

We start by trying out rides like the bumper cars and then the bumper boats. It’s funny how every time she tries to bump into me and I always evade it because of my good reflexes and she pouted. Well, you can’t beat me easily in such thing. Then she challenges me to ride a drop tower, which I actually fear. Yes, I’m afraid of heights.

“Aww, the big bad wolf is afraid of heights~~” she makes fun of me

“I’m not! Fine! Let’s go! I’ll show you I’m not afraid!”

It was the worst choice I ever made. While the tower is going up, I’m already pale blue. It’s high! Too high! And when it suddenly drops, I scream from the top of my lungs while she on the other hand is laughing. As soon as I get down from the ride, I lose all my strength that she needs to help me walk to the nearest bench to sit down and calm myself. Her? Still laughing at me.

“I thought you’re lying about your fear of heights but it was actually real!” she says in disbelief and while laughing at me

“You’re a devil…” I say in reply

“Pfftt, sorry, sorry. It’s just you’re cute when you’re scared.” I blush at her exclamation

“Whatever…” I say and hide my blushing face

“Wait here, I’ll go get something to drink.” Okta left

It’s fun. Really fun. I really should thank her for taking me here. If not because of her, I wouldn’t be having fun like this. Maybe…not all humans are bad. You just need the right person to make you realize that simple thing.

Anyways, what took her so long? I go and search for her and find her being surrounded by some scoundrels trying to hook up on her. I search for some bushes to hide and then transform into my wolf form. I jump in front of them and roar. Those scoundrels run away while screaming in fear. I turn back into my human form. Okta still stand there in shock.

“Sorry for startling you.” I say

She shakes her head “Thank you. It’s the second time you saved me.” Her face is filled with guilt

I pat her head “It’s okay. Next time, don’t go to quiet places without me.” I say comforting her

“Hey, the sun’s going down, should we head back home?” I ask

“Wait, there’s still one more thing!” She grabs my hand and take me to follow her “Come! You’ll like it!”

As we leave that place, I hear some noises from the bushes but when I look back, there’s no one there. I hope no one sees me transforming before. We then head to a ride, just really by the sea, the Ferris wheel. It’s high but, at least it’s not scary so I guess I could bare this.

“Come on, they say the view from up there is beautiful!”

I follow her and enter the cart. I sit face to face with her. The cart goes higher slowly. She’s right. The view is amazing. We can see the sea from here and also the beautiful sunset. I never knew that the world is such an amazing place. I might have live long, but I was blinded by my hatred and sadness that I can’t even see the world’s beauty. If not because of her….

“Desy…” She calls my name “You know, I’m very grateful of you. If not because of you, maybe I couldn’t be here now.”

“You’re exaggerating. It’s not a big deal.” I smile

“Yeah…hey, would you listen to me? This…may sound a little strange…”

I’m confused. But I faintly see her face reddened a bit. My heart starts to beat faster.

“I….might have fallen in love with you” she paused “I-I know it’s strange but I just feel comfortable by your side. I enjoy the time we spent together. I know it’s just a short period of time but, I just can’t stop thinking about you. So…I…” She’s at lost of words. It’s the first time I hear her stutters like that. This is not a dream. Right there the girl I adore…

“I feel the same too.” I answer “You saved me from the darkness. From the hatred and sadness I was engulfed in. You show me that the world is beautiful…so…would you go out with me?” I smile. I finally say those words

A drop of tear runs down her cheek. She suddenly hops and hugs me. “Yes!” she shouts very happily. I hug her back. I’m very grateful that she felt the same way as I am. It’s like one in a million chances. I hope, this peaceful time would last forever…

It’s just a fantasy…

Pain comes up like thorns…

Like a night that lost the moon…

An empty sign…

My tragedy…

Ever since me and Okta starts dating, the world seems a lot more colorful to me. I know some new places and know more new people. Sometimes every weekend we would go into new places on a date like the movies, parks, restaurant or some coffee shop. It’s very enjoyable. She’s like a goddess to me. I can’t imagine my world without her.

But besides that, I sometimes felt that someone is following us. I told Okta about this and she felt the same but there hasn’t been some suspicious person coming to her. I hope it’s just a random stalker or just my feelings. I could always bite them if they try to mess with us.

Tonight goes smoothly as usual. But then suddenly comes a middle aged man dressed in a black coat and wears a fedora hat. He sits at one of the table. Looks like a regular customer but I have a bad feeling about him. He then asks for the menu. I go to his table and give him it.

“Hey miss” He calls

“Yes, sir?”

“Do you….believe in creatures like werewolves?”

I’m shook. Calm down, me. He must be just random asking such a thing. There’s no way someone found out about you. “No, sir. I think those kind of things doesn’t exist.” I answer calmly

“I see…and here I thought I could find someone to talk about these things.”

“I’m sorry, sir.”

I take his order and goes back to my station. Such a strange and suspicious man. I guess he’s just a random man interested in mythical creatures. I hope. Not long, that suspicious man then goes out after finishing his meal.

It’s the closing time already. After finished locking the shop, me and Okta go home together like always. But my mind is filled with worries about that man earlier.

“Is something wrong?” She asks noticing my worried face

“Oh, it’s nothing.” I don’t want to worry her. Not long, we arrive at Okta’s house “So, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Yes” She answers. She then suddenly kisses my cheek “Try not to overthink things okay?”

I nodded and smile. Just when I’m turning back, BANG! A bullet suddenly hits my right shoulder. I’ll be alright if it’s just a normal bullet, but this time, It’s a silver bullet. I fall to the ground and scream in pain. I felt my wound is burning. With my blurry vision I see Okta who sees that rushes to me but then also suddenly get hit in the head and faint. I’m mad, but I can’t do anything because of the silver bullet. I look up with my last strength to see our attacker and noticed…it was him….the man from before. I’m losing my consciousness and suddenly everything fade to black.

.

.

.

.

.

I woke up from the sharp pain from my right shoulder. I look around to find myself tied on a chair in some kind of a lab. On my right arm there’s a needle attached with a rubber tube into some kind of a chemical vessel. Right across me I see Okta still unconscious with her hand tied to the chair. I try to transform myself into a wolf but can’t. I think I’m still weak because of the wound the bullet caused.

“Ah, you’re finally awake.” Says the man who’s now using a white lab coat

“What do you want?” I ask furiously

“Now, now, don’t be mad like that. I need something from you now miss werewolf” He approaches me

“I’m not a werewolf.”

“Do you still think you can fool me?” he takes a knife and then suddenly stabs it to my right arm. I scream at the burning pain. It was a silver knife. “No one would react like this to silver except for werewolves.” He threatens me “Anyways, I think I’ll be needing a few liters of your blood. Do you mind? Wait, of course you don’t. Because you’re gonna die running out of blood.” He laugh

“That false rumor again? You won’t get anything from my blood. It won’t grant you eternality.”

“Oh, yes I won’t. But it will give me the ability to heal any wound, any disease.”

“Your kind have tried to drink my kind’s blood and went in vain.”

“Because they’re foolish to drink the blood just like that. You know, I was there when they slaughtered your kind—wait, wait, that’s not it. I’m the mastermind behind that attack.”

Impossible! That was like hundreds of years ago?! But I thought that it was just a false rumor! I see them die. I see most of those men died by age.

“You seem shocked. Well, they’re actually missing one thing.” He points out at the red moon just outside the window “The blood will only take effect if you drink it during the red moon. You know it yourself right that during the red moon, your power will increase twice? That’s the reason I could live until now. The blood regenerates my cells, making me young again and heals wound faster.”

“You maniac…” I mock him in hatred. I’m in rage.

“Ooops, If you try to transform into your wolf form, I’m going to kill this girl” He point out a gun at Okta’s head “How could she likes a beast like you. Pffft she’s a strange girl” He then goes to prepare things.

I’m at a dead end. I can’t do anything reckless. I need to think out of a plan to get both of us out of here and kill that man. He’s the one who slaughtered my whole family! My whole clan! I can’t forgive him!

Across, I see Okta starting to regain her consciousness. She looks confused and scared. When she looks at me, she starts to look pale seeing my wound.

“Don’t worry. It’s nothing big.” I comfort her with a small smile

“But…your wound….”

“I’ll get us definitely out of here. And then, we can enjoy our life as usual. You don’t need to worry.”

That’s right! I need to get out of here! I wouldn’t let anyone destroy my life after I could finally enjoy my everyday life with her! I’m definitely going to get out of here!

“Well then, let us begin the blood transfusion. Or should I say, blood extraction, HA HA HA” He turns on some kind of pump and the needle in my arm starts sucking my blood slowly, transferring it to that vessel. As the red moonlight hits that vessel, the blood start to shine just like an elixir. He was right. It wasn’t just a false rumor.

Slowly, I begin to lose my consciousness again because my blood being drained. My vision is blurry. I can’t think of anymore plan. The man is busy adoring his work while across me I faintly see Okta slowly cut the rope that ties her with the sharp edge of the chair. If only I could gather my strength, then I could attack that man suddenly but…I’m too weak for that now.

I see Okta finally unties her rope and she goes to attack that man. I want to help but my strength…she hits the man with a glass bottle but the man’s ability to regenerate because of the blood heals him quickly. He took a stick and hit it right on to Okta’s head, making her fell unconscious and wounded head. As I see blood runs down from her head, I couldn’t think clear anymore. I’m filled with rage. With all of my last remaining strength I turned into my wolf form. With my giant claws, I ripped his heart out from his chest and with my fangs I bit his head off from his body. No one could survive that.

I turn into my human form again and hurriedly goes to Okta. Her injury is serious. I need to do something! Right! I could just heal her with my blood!

I take the vessel that contains the elixir and make Okta drinks it. Slowly her wound heals and she regain her consciousness. We then run away from that place and goes back to her house before anyone else sees us.

Okta tends my wound as soon as we arrived at her house. My wound is regenerating slowly because it was caused by silver. But I feel less pain now. I’m grateful that both of us could make it out alive. I can’t let her be in danger again because of me.

“You okay?” She asks me while caressing my head

I took her hand and put it on my face. I almost cry. “I’m…just glad you’re alive.”

We look into each other’s eye and our face is getting close. Our lips finally met. I can feel her sweet lips. It’s the first time ever I kissed someone. It feels warm. We decided to rest for tonight.

As she’s asleep, I just can’t rest at the thought of her hurt. I can’t. If she stays with me like this, she’ll never be safe. I love her, really. I don’t want to leave her. But, I also don’t want her to experience this kind of thing again. I’m sorry. This is the only choice I have.

I slipped out of bed. I look up for a pen and paper and wrote her a letter:

Dear Okta,

            I’m sorry I have to leave like this. I don’t want you to experience this kind of things again. I’m sorry I couldn’t fulfill my promise to be there anytime you need me. It’s okay if you come to hate me. I know this is my one side decision. But I hope you’ll understand.

Thank you for all of your kindess, your love and the sweet memories. You’re the best thing in my life that I ever had. You’re a fantasy that became reality.

Love,

Desy

I put the letter on the side of the bed. I look at her for the last time. Remembering each of her details into my memory. It’s such a short time but I really enjoy my time with you. But we just can’t be together. At the end my wish won’t become reality….It’s just….

It’s all mine…

It’s my fantasy…